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13 Things That Aren’t Worth Settling for in a Happy Relationship

Step into the realm of love, where the heart reigns supreme, and choices carry weight. Yet, in the intricate tapestry of a relationship, certain elements should never be subject to compromise. Ranging from mutual respect to shared values, here are 13 aspects you should never settle for in a relationship, as they form the bedrock of genuine happiness and fulfillment.

1. Your Partner is Being a Jerk to Your Family and Friends

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Love is not just about the two of you; it’s about the people who surround you. If they’re a vermin to your family and friends, it’s a major red flag. After all, respecting you means respecting those you hold dear. Don’t settle for a relationship that isolates you from your loved ones, making gatherings awkward and uncomfortable. 

2. Bringing Up Old Fights

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In healthy relationships, old fights remain just that – in the past. If your partner constantly brings up past arguments to make you feel guilty, it’s a sign of trouble. A wholesome relationship is built on trust and forgiveness. Revisiting past mistakes during every disagreement is unfair and detrimental to the relationship. 

3. Not Asking about Your Day

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“How was your day?” It’s a simple question but carries a powerful effect. It shows that your partner is invested in you and wants to know about your day. Caring for each other is a two-way street, and just as you inquire about your partner’s day, they should do the same for you. Mutual interest and mutual care are tiny yet mighty acts. It’s the glue that binds two souls.

3. Your Partner Being Forgetful About Things that Matter to You

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While no one expects a flawless memory, remembering significant things in your life is a bare minimum. For instance, if you are passionate about art, they might surprise you with a visit to a local gallery or gift your favorite book simply because they remembered that you mentioned wanting to read it. These acts of thoughtfulness, no matter how small, are the building blocks of a considerate connection, adding depth to your relationship.

4. Not Listening Attentively

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If you share your day, dreams, or worries with your partner, they should put aside their phone and actively engage in the conversation. It shows genuine interest in your thoughts and feelings rather than being lost in a digital world or distracted by TV. It’s a basic principle of love and respect.

5. Your Partner Trying to “Fix” You

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In loving relationships, personal growth and nurturing happen naturally over time and are never forced. It’s crucial to understand that you are not a project to be fixed (and vice versa). Your partner should cheer you on to be the best ‘you,’ how you want to be, not how they want you to be.

6. Restricting Your ‘Me-Time’

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While it may seem romantic for your partner to always want your company, it’s essential to recognize when their desire to be around you turns into possessiveness. Taking an afternoon for self-care, getting a manicure, or hanging out with friends is not just a luxury but a necessity for your mental health. If your partner becomes upset or tries to make you feel guilty about this, it’s a sign that their behavior is more about control than love.

7. Jealousy

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It’s important to understand that the right match will trust you and never ask you to sacrifice your friendships, even with the opposite gender, out of insecurity. Feeling paranoid or pressured to give up your company for your partner’s comfort is not a healthy dynamic.

8. Offensive Partner

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Suppose your partner keeps making gender-biased, racist remarks or making fun of how someone looks without even realizing they are insulting. In that case, it shows they have serious issues with understanding and thinking. They must acknowledge their error, learn from it, and try to be a better, more empathetic person.

9. Making You Uncomfortable in Public

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Your partner does not need to be your constant guardian, but they should prioritize your comfort when you guys are out in public. Like, ditching you at social gatherings with your friends or misbehaving around people, making you feel uneasy and unvalued, is just not ok. 

10. Loving Themselves More Than You

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You make an unbreakable relationship when you focus on creating an “us” rather than just “me.” Finding the balance between self-love and love for your partner is vital. If your partner is being self-obsessed to the point of neglecting you, it is a serious concern. Your partner should love you just as deeply as they love themselves, and sometimes even more.

11. Not Empowering You

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You should have a strong foundation of self-assurance outside of your relationship, and your partner’s role is to enhance that feeling. They should make you feel the most attractive, intelligent, and utterly unique rather than tearing you down or criticizing you in non-constructive ways that have no place in a healthy relationship.

12. Always Tired and Lazy

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You should be partners, not just cheerleaders for one another. While everyone experiences lazy days, it’s unhealthy if your partner’s life is consistently a string of those days or if they rely on you for motivation. Both of you should be somewhat self-motivated and bring it to the table.

13. Your Partner Being Emotionally Unavailable

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Your partner should be there to listen when you need someone to vent out about your bad day. When you share your experiences, it’s a must that they understand your emotions and empathize with what you’re going through. 

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